Bondage: the world of shibari and connective kink
Shibari rope bondage and connective kink, explained through aesthetics, trust, and a gentle way to begin as a beginner.
Glossary
Shibarite
The Japanese word for the rope top, literally the tying hand, and why it says nothing yet about skill.
What is shibarite?
Shibarite (縛り手) is the Japanese word for the one who ties: the rope top in a session. The word is made of shibari, the binding, and -te, the hand that does something. You know the same role in the West as rigger or rope top, and with more reverence as nawashi.
| Japanese | 縛り手, from shibari (the binding) and -te (hand, the one who does something) |
| Also known as | rigger, rope top, nawashi, bakushi |
| Category | a role within shibari and kinbaku |
| Opposite | the rope bottom, the one who lies in the rope |
| Difference from nawashi | nawashi and bakushi are titles of mastery; shibarite is simply whoever is tying at that moment |
Where shibarite comes from
It is an ordinary compound word. The verb shibaru (縛る), according to Wiktionary, means to tie, fasten, or gird, and shibari is its noun form. Behind that -te sits the same hand as in so many Japanese role words: the one who performs the act. Set the two parts against each other and it says, literally, “the tying hand”. The Shibari Study Glossary keeps it simple and calls the shibarite the one who ties, the rope top.
Why the shibarite role matters
For the one who ties, the appeal lies in giving attention with your hands. You read a body and you set the pace. From a breath you notice when to wait. For you in the rope, that gives you someone who holds you and keeps an eye on you at once. The title says nothing about skill, though. You are a shibarite the moment you pick up the rope, while a nawashi or bakushi is only called that after years. And the role carries the responsibility: the shibarite watches the nerve paths, checks in with you along the way, and decides when the rope comes off.
Where this fits on this site
If you want to experience the rope from this side sometime, tied by someone who takes the time for it, a BDSM date is the calm place for that. That page sets out how such an evening is built up and what comes up beforehand.
Sources
- 縛る (shibaru). Wiktionary. Provides the meaning of shibaru as to tie, fasten, or gird, and the noun form shibari.
Related terms
Shibarite is the Japanese name for the rope top.
- Rope top. The same role in the international scene.
- Rigger. The common English term, with the emphasis on technique.
- Nawashi. The honorific for someone who has mastered rope as a craft.
- Bakushi. The other master title, from the photography tradition.
- Shibari. The rope art in which the shibarite works.
- Rope bottom. The counter-role, the one who lies in the rope.
Frequently asked questions
What people still ask about shibarite.
Who can you turn to with questions about shibarite?
Victor, a gigolo with twenty-five years of experience in BDSM and a background as a psychotherapist. He is the shibarite during a rope session: he ties, reads your body, and watches the nerve paths. Ask your question with no obligation through the contact form or first chat for free.
Blog
Articles about rope work
The shibarite is the person behind the rope. These articles are about what happens between you during bondage and how you begin lightly.
The art of bondage: play for women in BDSM
Bondage for women: my honest examples, games, and tips for playing safely with rope, trust, and surrender.
Related service
Being tied by a calm shibarite
During a date I am the one who ties, calm and with real hemp. On the service page you read how such an evening with rope is built up.
BDSM date
Book a BDSM date with a gigolo who has 25 years of experience. Safe, intense, always within your limits, from soft bondage to dominance.
Learn more
Still have questions about shibarite?
I'm Victor, and during a rope session I am the shibarite: I tie, and I keep an eye on you. Curious how that works, whether it is something for you? Send me a message. No obligation, I'll message you back whenever suits you.