Before we meet
The conversation before a gigolo date
That first message grows into a conversation. Here's what we talk about, and why it makes the rest of the date so much easier.
The conversation before a gigolo date is where we get to know each other and settle everything that matters. What you’re looking for, where your boundaries sit, your safeword, and anything I need to know to keep you safe. No question is too much here, and you set the pace the whole way through.
Getting to know each other first
We start easy. Two people finding out if they click, nothing more complicated than that. We talk about what you’re after and where your limits are. No question is silly, so ask me anything. Take all the time you want, because I’d rather you made a choice that really fits you than a quick one.
Photos
During our conversation I’ll also send you a photo or two of myself. That way you can decide in your own time whether you feel drawn to me, or not. And if you decide you don’t find me attractive and would rather not go ahead with the date, that’s completely okay too. I value honesty far more than “ghosting.”
I’d also love to get a photo of you, so I can get a better sense of your vibe. It helps us both picture who we are and whether the chemistry is there. But it isn’t required, not if it makes you uncomfortable.
It’s all about a relaxed experience that feels good for both of us, and a photo helps with that.
Unless we decide to make it extra exciting and go for a real blind date, of course. In that case photos aren’t needed at all.
Your wishes and desires
Your wishes, dreams, desires, fantasies and limits are always the starting point. Before every date we take the time to go over what you’re looking for, which activities appeal to you and what you feel good about. There’s always room to talk openly, before, during and after our date.
Finding it hard to put into words what you do and don’t want? Fill in the inspiration form. You mark what you say yes to and what you don’t. A few minutes’ work, whenever it suits you.
This can range from sensuality all the way to dominance and submission. The better I know what you want to experience, the better I can make it happen for you. It also decides what I do and don’t bring along.
We also talk about how you want that first meeting to go, because a first time is always extra exciting. We can meet calmly in a public or private setting so you land at your own pace. A flying start is possible too, where you get completely swept off your feet. Exciting and challenging, and it can also be overwhelming. No surprise if that turns out to be too much for many people.
Your safety comes first
Your safety comes first, always.
Sexual trauma, physical or psychological limitations, and medication are important things I’d like to know beforehand. If you’re prone to an epileptic seizure, for example, I want to know how to handle it. Or if you have certain triggers that can set off strong reactions, I’d like to hear that in advance too. It’s really no problem if these things happen. I’m prepared for them and I know how to deal with them well. And if tears come, that’s completely fine as well. In fact, I can even help you work through some of it.
Your safety and how you feel matter more than anything, so please be open about what I need to know to give you a safe, comfortable experience.
Expectations
So if you have specific expectations, say them out loud. Only then can I take them into account. Keeping your wishes and expectations to yourself and still hoping they come true is a bit like waiting on a pizza you never ordered.
And if it’s about BDSM, feel free to fill in the inspiration list. Then I know a little more about you: what turns you on, and what you’d love to try someday.
STIs and condoms
Managing the risk of STIs is an essential part of what happens between us. That’s why I always use condoms for penetration as a standard safety measure. Oral can be without.
My health is something I take seriously. Regular STI testing is part of my routine, and if any symptoms show up I go straight to my doctor. I expect and appreciate the same openness and responsibility from you. If you catch an STI, you’re obliged to let me know. That’s out of respect, and to stop it spreading further. The other way around, if I ever have an STI, I’ll tell you right away as well.
Talking openly about STIs and safety measures strengthens our mutual safety and trust, and makes for a carefree, pleasant time together.
How you signal your limits
We agree clearly on how you can signal your limits. In principle, “stop” always means stop and “no” always means no. Tapping out, by hand or with your feet, counts as stop or no as well. Clear and easy, nothing to memorize.
At a stop, the dynamic pauses and we sit down calmly to recover or to talk. Then we decide together how we go on. It’s crucial for me that I can trust you to clearly say when a stop is needed. If that’s hard for you, let me know. Then I’ll be extra careful and check in with you more often.
If you tend to say “stop” or “no” without really wanting to stop, we can agree on a different safeword. That way we both know exactly how a limit gets signaled.
This matters even more for a first time, or when the sexuality is loaded for you. You should feel safe, at every moment.
What happens next
Once your wishes and your limits are clear, I’ll send you a proposal with a date, time, duration and price. After that comes the practical part: where we meet, what you wear, how you arrange a safety call. That’s all covered in the preparation.
Ready to start that conversation? A short message on WhatsApp is enough, or email me first if you’d rather not share your number yet.