Podcast interview: Victor on what BDSM really is
Jolanda from Brabants Meisje interviews Victor about what BDSM really is, beyond the whips, about dominance and why it stays equal for him.
Glossary
D-type
One word for the whole leading side, whether you are called Dom, master or owner.
What is a D-type?
A D-type is the collective name for anyone on the leading side of a D/s relationship: the dominant, the master, the owner. The term says which side of the power exchange someone is on, apart from the title or the style that goes with it. The yielding side is called the s-type.
| Dutch term | Identical. D-type is an English scene term used untranslated in Dutch |
| Also known as | the leading party, the dominant, the Dom; which word fits depends on title and style |
| Category | position within D/s, and with that within BDSM |
| Counterpart | the s-type, the yielding side, see submission and sub |
| Not to be confused with | a top: a top performs the act, a D-type has the say-so |
| Core condition | the power is given by the s-type, not taken by the D-type |
Where the word comes from
D-type and s-type are shorthand the scene uses to name the two sides of a dynamic without immediately picking a title or a gender. The encyclopedia describes that power exchange as the empowering of the dominant because the submissive surrenders to their control. The kink encyclopedia sums up the leading figure as the D-type: the one who exercises the control or the authority.
Why people use the term
The word is handy because it fixes nothing except direction. A D-type can be called Dom, master or owner, can be strict or caring, and the label still holds. For someone still searching for which title suits him, that is convenient. You know which side you are on before you know how you fill that side in. What the term does not do is say anything about how someone is outside the play. According to that same encyclopedia the yielding side keeps the underlying control in practice, because that is where the limits lie. What a D-type does in practice is something I go over with you beforehand on a BDSM date.
Sources
- Dominance and submission. Wikipedia. Provides the description of power exchange as the empowering of the dominant through the submissive’s surrender, and the finding that the submissive keeps the underlying control.
Related terms
- BDSM. The broader practice the D/s relationship falls within.
- Dominant. The role that most often falls under D-type, with everything it asks.
- Submission. The yielding side, which a D-type gets the power from.
- D/s. The relationship that D-type is the leading half of.
- Sub. The common word for the s-type.
- Top. Who performs the act, which is different from who decides.
- Switch. Who is D-type one time and s-type the next.
Frequently asked questions
What people still ask about D-type.
What is a D-type?
A D-type is anyone on the leading side of a D/s relationship: the dominant, the master or the owner. The term names the side of the power exchange, not the title or the style. The yielding side is called the s-type.
What is the difference between a D-type and a top?
A D-type has the say-so, a top performs the act. You can be a top without being a D-type, for instance if you do something the other decides, and a D-type without ever performing anything yourself. The distinction is in who decides, not in who holds the whip.
Who can you turn to with questions about D-type?
Victor, a gigolo with about twenty-five years of experience in BDSM and a background as a psychotherapist. He often works from the leading side and is happy to think through with you what that role would mean for you. You can ask him a question through the contact form or first chat for free.
Blog
Articles about the leading role
This page gives the term. These articles are about how the leading side of BDSM feels in practice and what is involved in handing over and taking on control.
Medical play without the white coat: the exam is the scene
The most-played form of medical play uses no instrument at all. What happens instead, why lying still works, and where the law begins.
Your first time at a play party: what to expect
What happens at a play party, who the DM is, how the house rules work, and why watching is the most normal thing to do all evening.
BDSM fantasy and your partner isn't into it: how to handle it
You have a BDSM fantasy and your partner isn't into it. What you can and can't do, how to have the conversation, and why pushing backfires.
SM Room for Rent: BDSM Rooms and Play Spaces in the Netherlands and Beyond
BDSM rooms and SM play spaces for rent across the Netherlands, Belgium, France and Germany: SM cottages, SM B&Bs, setup, prices and what to check.
Related service
The leading side, with someone who knows what he is doing
If you want to experience the role from below, I take the lead as a D-type and keep an eye on how it ends. The service page shows how a BDSM date goes.
BDSM date
Book a BDSM date with a gigolo who has 25 years of experience. Safe, intense, always within your limits, from soft bondage to dominance.
Learn more
Still have questions about being a D-type?
I am Victor, a gigolo with a dominant side. If you want to work out what the leading role means for you, I am happy to think it through with you, no strings attached. Ask your question, no obligation, I will text you back at your ease.