Gigolo in Groningen

The north asks for time

Groningen sits a good two hours from Amsterdam. For a short evening that’s a waste; for a long evening or an overnight stay it’s excellent. So here I’d rather plan something more generous, and in practice that works out better for everyone: no eye on the clock, no rush at the end.

Plan a few weeks ahead if you can. Then I pick a moment when I really have the time.

City and countryside

The city of Groningen is young, a quarter of the population studies there, and that makes the centre lively and anonymous at once. You walk into a hotel here and nobody looks up. The Grote Markt, the Vismarkt, the Groninger Museum on the water, the terraces that stay full late.

Beyond it a whole different province begins. Het Hogeland with its mound villages and little churches. Delfzijl and the Ems. Winschoten, Veendam, the Oldambt with those endless fields. The Wadden coast at Lauwersoog, where the nights are darker than anywhere else in the Netherlands.

What we can do together

In the city: eating, drinking, a museum, or simply walking along the Diepenring. Outside the city: the mudflats at Lauwersoog, the dikes of Het Hogeland, the Reitdiep, or the woods near Norg just over the border into Drenthe.

And it doesn’t have to happen. If you’d rather sit somewhere quiet straight away and only then see what the evening becomes, that’s just as much a plan. Often an easier plan when you’re tense.

Discretion in city and village

In the city of Groningen discretion is simple: enough people, enough coming and going, nobody paying anyone any mind. In the villages it’s different. On Het Hogeland or in the Oldambt people notice who comes and goes.

So there I do it carefully. The parking spot is your choice, even if that means I walk ten minutes. No flowers. No loud greeting on the doorstep, and no ringing until you open. If anyone asks who I am, I stick exactly to the story you came up with.

I work with no one behind me. There’s no agency and no middleman, and no records anywhere that your name ends up in. I discuss you with no one.

Who I come to Groningen for

For married women whose home no longer holds the touch they’re looking for. For women starting over after a divorce who don’t know how that goes. For widows, whose body is already further along than the head. That’s more normal than it feels. For women who live in a village where this can’t be discussed with anyone. For students and PhD candidates who have everything under control except this.

And for couples who want to try something new together. What’s possible is set out under my services, from touch and skin hunger to an erotic overnight.

How it goes

It starts with a message: where you are, roughly what you’re looking for, and when you’d want. It can be short. Two sentences are enough and you don’t have to make anything sound better than it is.

Usually there’s an answer the next day. After that we talk on until it’s right for you: by app, by phone, or first a calm meeting with nothing having to come of it. That happens more often than you’d think.

Before we set a date you know the plan and the total, travel costs included. Nothing is billed after the fact. No surcharges for the evening, the night, the weekend or public holidays, and booking as a couple costs no extra.

What you can expect from me

On time and well turned out, that’s the least of it. The largest part of this work is listening, without steering. Nothing throws me. You set the pace, even when it changes halfway. Changing your mind is no problem and certainly no failure. And I discuss you with no one.

What it isn’t

It’s not an agency with a catalogue you pick someone from. There’s no middleman between us: from your first message you’re talking to me, and I’m also the one who comes. No list of acts is ticked off beforehand and I don’t work from a script.

And it’s not a performance where you have to show something. You don’t have to look like someone on the internet, you don’t have to prove anything, and you don’t have to apologise for anything: not for your body, not for your age, not for what you’d like.

Choose your city

Below is the city of Groningen, the only municipality in the province above ninety thousand residents. Live in Delfzijl, Winschoten, Veendam, Stadskanaal or one of the villages on Het Hogeland? Then pick the city or just send me a message with where you are.

This is how it starts

Let me know: where you are, and when it would suit. Want to read first who’ll be sitting across from you, that story is here.