Gigolo in Essen

Not what you expect

If you only know Essen from the map, you picture smokestacks. The truth is that the south of the city is villa districts, forest and a big lake. Essen was European Green Capital once, and that was no joke.

For a date that makes a difference. You can walk here a whole afternoon without it feeling like a city trip, and be back in the center ten minutes later.

What we can do together

The Baldeneysee, where you can walk for hours or take a boat out. Zollverein, the mine on the world heritage list that by now looks like a museum of steel and light. The Villa Hügel, the Krupp family’s house, with a park around it. And the Museum Folkwang, which holds a better collection than the city ever admits to.

Or we do none of that and simply start indoors, with tea and a conversation that only gets somewhere after half an hour.

Language

German, English or Dutch. You begin, and if you switch halfway I just follow.

Who I come here for

For women who are married and have long missed what they can’t put a name to. Also for women starting over after a divorce who don’t know how that goes. For widows carrying guilt about their own desire, guilt that is not needed at all. Just as much for women who work in care or teaching and have to be strong all day.

Couples just as well. What is possible is under my services, from touch and skin hunger to intimate time together.

Discreet in a crowded region

The Ruhr area is one continuous urban stretch, and for discretion that is an advantage. If you live in Essen and would rather not meet in Essen, you are in Bochum, Duisburg or Düsseldorf in a quarter of an hour. No one there knows you.

For the rest I do it as always. Park where you want, no flowers, no loud arrival, and a story ready in case someone asks who I am.

Where we meet

Usually a hotel. In Rüttenscheid there are a few that sit comfortably and where nobody looks at you, and in the south by the Baldeneysee you have quiet and greenery right outside the door. Handy if you’d rather walk for an hour first before anything happens indoors.

Home works too, as long as you feel at ease there. That is the only condition. We agree beforehand what time I arrive, where I park, and what gets said if anyone asks.

Money, settled up front

Before anything is fixed you know it all. What we do, how long it lasts, what it costs, and which travel costs go with a three-hour drive. That is the full amount. Nothing surfaces at the end and nothing gets added on afterward.

I don’t do surcharges. Not for the evening, not for the night, not for the weekend, not for a public holiday. A date for two costs the same as alone. I ask for a deposit only when we make several days of it, simply because I then have to book accommodation.

How it goes

It starts with a message. Short is fine. Where you are, what you’re after, when you could. Usually you have an answer within a day, and after that we write back and forth until it feels right for you. There is no point where you are locked into anything.

On the day itself we start slow. Sitting, talking, and only when you are ready does the rest come. For most women that first part lasts a good deal longer than they had planned at home, and that is exactly right. After it, nothing has to be forced.

Doubts I often hear

“Doesn’t paying for this feel strange?” No. You pay for the time and attention of someone who takes this work seriously, the way you do with a masseur or a coach. What happens inside that time, you decide.

“Aren’t I too old for this?” Not in the least. The women who book me are between their twenties and well into their seventies, and the group over fifty is nowhere near small.

“I work in care and half of Essen knows me. What if someone sees me?” Then I am whoever you say I am. And if you want to take that risk away entirely, we meet a quarter of an hour on, in Bochum or Mülheim.

For couples

A share of my dates comes about through couples. The reason varies. Something has changed in what one of them can still do or wants, there is curiosity, or a fantasy has been spoken aloud for years without anything ever coming of it.

What it becomes, the two of you decide. Watching, joining in, or sitting in the next room with a book. My one condition is that the conversation about it has really been had, and that each of you can call a stop at any moment. Halfway through as well, and without explanation. For two people you pay no more with me than for one.

This is how it starts

Send me a message with where you are and when you’d want. If you’d like to read a bit first, the frequently asked questions are here.