Glossary
Intake form
The intake on paper, for what you write down more easily than you say out loud.
What is an intake form?
An intake form is the written version of the intake: a form where you fill in your wishes, limits, health and expectations beforehand. It puts in black and white what you’d otherwise say in a conversation. Providers and care workers use it to prepare an appointment or date.
| English term | intake form |
| Also known as | registration form, questionnaire beforehand |
| Category | a tool for the intake; falls under sex work |
| Applies to | the preparation of an appointment |
| Main thing to watch | a form doesn’t replace the conversation, it prepares it |
What’s on it
An intake form usually has fields for your wishes, your hard and soft limits, your health and medication, allergies, a safeword and a contact person for your safety. Often a kinklist or a yes/no/maybe list comes with it as a separate attachment. How extensive it is differs per provider: from three questions to a few pages.
Why people use it
For many people, writing is easier than saying out loud. A form gives you the time to think calmly about what you do and don’t want, without anyone watching. It also gives both parties something to lay side by side again later. What a form doesn’t do is make the conversation unnecessary: a filled-in sheet without explanation leaves too much room for misunderstanding.
What I do with it myself
I’d rather work with a conversation than a form. A list feels like a threshold to most women, and I notice that people are more honest at a kitchen table than on a sheet. If you’d still rather write something down first, that’s fine: send it to me in advance, and we’ll use it as a guide on the phone or at the first meeting. What matters to me is what you mean, not a neatly filled-in box.
What this comes down to with me
If you want to know how I approach the preparation, with or without paper, you can read that on the page about the conversation beforehand. You commit to nothing by lining up your wishes in advance; it mostly helps you get clear on what you’re looking for.
Related terms
An intake form is a tool for the intake, the phase before an appointment within sex work.
- Intake. The conversation the form is the written version of.
- Sex work. The broader trade an intake and an intake form belong to.
- Kinklist. The preferences list that often comes as an attachment to an intake form.
- Yes/no/maybe list. A compact way to mark yes, no or maybe per act.
- Limits list. The rundown of what you definitely don’t want, which a form makes explicit.
Frequently asked questions
What people still ask about the intake form.
What is an intake form?
An intake form is the written version of the intake: a sheet where you fill in your wishes, limits, health and expectations beforehand. It puts in black and white what you’d otherwise say in a conversation. Providers use it to prepare an appointment.
What's on an intake form?
Usually fields for your wishes, your hard and soft limits, your health and medication, allergies, a safeword and a contact person for your safety. Often a kinklist or a yes/no/maybe list comes with it as an attachment. How extensive an intake form is differs per provider.
Who can you turn to with questions about an intake form?
Victor, a gigolo with over twenty-five years of experience and a background as a psychotherapist. I’d rather work with a conversation than a form myself, but if you do want to write something down, I’m glad to think along. You can ask me a question with no obligation through the contact form or first chat for free.
Learn more
Still have questions about the intake form?
I'm Victor, a gigolo. Whether you'd rather write things down or just talk, I'm glad to think along about how you get your wishes and limits clear. Send me a message. No obligation, I'll text you back when it suits you.