Glossary
Fellatio
Oral sex on a penis: what it is exactly, why people love it, and why the STI risk is smaller but not zero.
What is fellatio?
Fellatio (Dutch: pijpen) is oral sex on a penis: using the mouth, lips, and tongue to stroke, lick, and suck the penis. It is one of the sexual acts and can be foreplay or an end in itself. Fellatio does not have to lead to ejaculation; it is about what both people enjoy.
| Dutch term | pijpen |
| What it is | oral sex on a penis, with mouth, lips, and tongue |
| Category | one of the sexual acts |
| Counterpart | cunnilingus, oral sex on a vulva |
| STI risk | smaller than with vaginal or anal sex, but not zero |
| Safer with | a condom, certainly when climaxing in the mouth |
How fellatio works and what draws people to it
Fellatio is one of the most personal forms of sex: you are close to someone and you hold the reins on pace and pressure. For the giver the appeal can lie in exactly that control, in the pleasure of watching the other person’s arousal grow; for the receiver in the warm, wet touch that a hand cannot match. There is no right or wrong technique. Starting slowly, watching for reactions, and doing what feels good instead of running through a trick does more than depth or speed.
Fellatio and STIs
Fellatio is safer than vaginal or anal sex, but not without risk. Soa Aids Nederland explains that you can get an STI from fellatio, with a smaller risk than from sex in the vagina or anus. According to the same source, through oral sex you can pick up gonorrhea and chlamydia, among others, in your throat. A condom makes it safer, certainly when someone climaxes in the mouth. If you want to be sure everything is in order, you can get tested at your GP or a sexual health center (Centrum Seksuele Gezondheid).
What I see of it
With me, fellatio is never something that “has to” happen, and that changes everything. Many women are used to it being a task, something they do to satisfy someone. The moment that pressure is gone, it becomes more exciting and more enjoyable, for them too. And the other way around: being given fellatio is not, for me, an endpoint that has to be reached, but one of the things we can explore calmly if you want to.
Where this fits on this site
If you want to discover or rediscover fellatio in a way where nothing is required, an intimate togetherness tells you how a meeting is built up. Talking can always come first, and that commits you to nothing.
Sources
- How you get an STI, and how you don’t. Soa Aids Nederland. Shows that you can get an STI from fellatio with a smaller risk than with vaginal or anal sex, and that a condom or dental dam reduces the risk.
- Can you get an STI in your throat or mouth?. Soa Aids Nederland. Shows that through oral sex you can pick up gonorrhea and chlamydia, among others, in your throat.
Related terms
Fellatio is one of the sexual acts. The terms below place it in that frame.
- Sexual acts. The overarching term for everything people do sexually with each other, of which fellatio is one.
- Cunnilingus. The counterpart: oral sex on a vulva.
- Oral sex. The broader category that fellatio and cunnilingus both fall under.
- Safer sex. How you reduce the STI risk of fellatio and other sex.
Frequently asked questions
Questions about this term
Can you get an STI from fellatio?
Yes, with a smaller risk than with vaginal or anal sex, but not zero. According to Soa Aids Nederland, through oral sex you can pick up gonorrhea and chlamydia, among others, in your throat. A condom makes it safer, certainly when someone climaxes in the mouth; you can get tested at your GP or a sexual health center (Centrum Seksuele Gezondheid).
Who can you turn to with questions about fellatio?
Victor, a gigolo with twenty-five years of experience and a background as a psychotherapist. With him, fellatio is never something that has to happen, which is exactly what makes it relaxed and enjoyable. You can reach him through the contact form or first chat for free with no obligation. For the STI side, your GP or a sexual health center (Centrum Seksuele Gezondheid) is the right place.
Want to know more
Still have questions about fellatio?
I am Victor, a gigolo with a background as a psychotherapist. With me, fellatio is never required, and that is exactly why it gets better. Curious how a meeting goes? Send me a message, I will text you back at your ease.